The theorist Homi Bhabha gave a lecture at the University of Richmond two years ago. He began by saying that when he went to Germany and saw the reminiscence of the Nazi era, he felt so emotional that he cried. Then, he proceeded to analyze his reaction to a past that according to stereotypes did not belong to him, because he was not German or Jewish. However, he felt part of the tragedy occurred in Germany, because he learned about it in books, movies, audio, and by visiting the former concentration camps. Paulo Freire would say that Bhabha was acting like a conscious man, since Bhabha had learned about the horrors of antisemitism by reading about when he was young, visiting the place as an adult, and by sharing with other people his experience and theories. In my opinion, Bhabha's philosophical post colonialist analysis on his trip to Germany was a logical continuation of Freire's conscientização. Information and knowledge on injustice, no matter where it happened, became part of Bhabha's conscience.
Bhabha also spoke about the anxiety that comes from living in a place where apparently we do not belong, and how art and literature can help us lower that anxiety. The article, “Racial Microaggressions and the Asian American Experience” by Sue et al, provided also a link to understanding how minorities suffer anxiety in their daily life. As Sue et al explain, those microagressions do not need to be the great rejection or discriminatory scene to hurt an individual's feelings.
I am not sure if I suffer anxiety because of microagressions, or due to the fact that I am a graduate student, and do not have the best financial situation. Also, I grew up in Mexico, where the forms of micragression described on the essay are part of jokes and the everyday life. Political correctness does not exist. Some of my friends who belong to a minority, or my minority group, pay more attention than I do. According to one of those friends, I need to be constantly thinking about discrimination in order to see how other people discriminate me. I have always believed that “to hate” is the same as “to love,” because when we hate something, we waste a lot of time, effort, heart, and brains in the act of. If I dedicate my life to the activity of looking for discrimination moments, then it is a waste of time, effort, heart, and brains, and I choose not hate anything or anybody—except for typewriters.
The lens that we use depends on where and how we grew up, and what education we received. In my case, I do not feel that microagressions keep me awake at night. Instinctively, I have done what Bhabha has suggested in his books and his talk, I have focused more on a creative process. I think more about taking photos, creating web pages, or writing than what people think or may think about me. The other problem is that I have always tried to think from the other's perspective. What would I think of me if I were somebody else? In other words, I am always conscious of the other person's perspective. Also, since I am a language and culture teacher, any microagression in my classes becomes a teachable moment. Perhaps, this is the reason why I never get mad at my students for saying for example, that Gael García Bernal is not a Hispanic actor because he looks too white, or when they ask me why I do not like the Mexican-American singer Selina. Some microagressions are born out of misunderstandings and lack of reflection, more than lack of education. Even well-educated, adult individuals express me their surprise when I tell them that I do not eat tacos from Taco-Bell, or that I do not recommend any of the Mexican restaurants in the Richmond area.
The only time I experience a microagression is when people ask me, “when did you come to America?” Sometimes I explain that I am an American, and that “America” does not means “The United States of America.” Like most citizens Latin American citizens will say, “I'm from America, because America is the name of the continent.” Once in a while I answer that half of my ancestors are native Americans, and then I don't explain anything else. But most of the time, I ignore the question because I believe that the aggressor would never understand that is wrong to name a country after a continent, and then appropriate that name. All the issues of colonialism, post colonialism, conscientização, and microagressions get summarized in this one question.
Belenky et al of Women's Ways of Knowing (1986) would say that my pet peeve with the noun “America,” and its application to the whole continent—not only to the United States of America—puts me into the category of “separate knowers.” I admit it, I am more of a logic, word, and conceptual person. My microagressions, then, differ from those described by Sue on the study of Asian-Americans and from those suffered by Hispanics, African-Americans and other minorities. I have been always aware of this situation, because if it doesn't affect me, it may affect however the students in my classes, and in particular the adult students. The microagressions that adult learners in my Spanish classes might feel the most come from the materials and topic presented on the books, which are mostly focused on students 22 and younger. Also, the use of technology may trigger more uncomfortable situations than teenager/young adultmaterials. As an expert or advanced user of some technologies, like wikis, microblogging, among others, I have to observe and listen to my adult students
constantly, because I do not want them to feel bad in my class.
Conscientização, microagressions, cultural anxiety, separate or connected knowledge... even if I experience them or not constantly, or if I pay attention to them, I need to be aware of what happens around me and what happens in the classroom. Now the question becomes, “How will I feel in the following weeks now that I am conscious of microagressions?”
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